Kicking Rocks: Hang ‘Em Up Already!

There’s nothing more depressing than watching an athlete refuse to admit that the career is over. I understand the feelings involved and the internal struggles one has with their own diminished abilities and, in essence, their own mortality, but there comes a point where you just have to say, “enough is enough,” and learn to walk away from the game gracefully. Between Andy Pettitte‘s comeback with the Yankees, Jamie Moyer’s 78 mph fastball and the Indians’ recent signing of Johnny Damon, we’re seeing it far too much in baseball and every day is starting to look like Old Timer’s Day.

I mean, really….how long is it going to take before Moyer’s junk pitches start getting tattooed out in Colorado? A 78 mph fastball? I think I might have to take a tally of distances reached by home runs hit off of him this year just for laughs. Sure, pitching against the Padres made him look like the “crafty veteran” that everyone loves to label him as, but let’s face it…it’s the Padres at a time where every hitter is struggling to muster up even the basest of hits.

Right now Moyer is sitting with a 2.55 ERA after three starts, but it should be noted that his opponents have been the Astros, Giants and Padres, three of the softest offenses in all of baseball. That 4.56 FIP is much more indicative of where his numbers will end up, and even that might be lowballing his end-of-season ERA. What happens when he faces the more potent lineups of the Reds, the Cardinals and the Braves? It’s going to get downright ugly, especially if you make the mistake of picking him up for your fantasy team.

And speaking of the old timer ruining your fantasy team, how is this Damon situation going to play out? At the age of 38, Damon is no longer the spry outfielder he once was. Over the last few years he has been a DH much more often with just an occasional splash of actual fielding time in left. So what does that mean for the Tribe’s lineup and your fantasy team?

Well, first off it ruins any value that Shelley Duncan may have accrued this season. While you can’t expect a strong batting average, you could certainly expect a slew of home runs with a full season of at-bats for him. And even if he wasn’t grabbing a full season’s worth because, miraculously, Grady Sizemore was able to return, he would easily be finding his way into the lineup more often than not with the ineptitude of Casey Kotchman and the injury history of both Sizemore and Michael Brantley.

Now with Damon there, Duncan moves into an automatic platoon because it’s not like Travis Hafner can do anything but DH, right? And you have to assume platoon because in no way can Damon’s aging, banged-up body handle a full season of left field, but they didn’t sign him to warm the bench. So that means half the value of Duncan (at best) and only half the value of what Damon may still have left in the tank. In the end, we’re going to see an awful lot of Indians with no more than 350 at-bats this season.

And then there’s Pettitte’s return. Not that he has impressed at all in this short season, but say goodbye to Phil Hughes as a starter. Pettitte is scheduled to arrive in mid-May which means that someone is getting bumped from the rotation. He didn’t make this comeback just to pitch out of the pen, guys. If you took a shot and drafted Hughes, you’ve wasted a pick. Minimal fantasy value at best now.

And of course, we don’t even know how Pettitte will fare. He had a nice, albeit shortened 2010, but he struggled in the few years before that. Now after taking all of 2011 off, we’re to believe that he’s going to come back even close to the vintage Pettitte we all once knew? Should be very interesting to see where that 89 mph fastball tops out this season.

Then there’s the Manny Ramirez situation. Come on, Manny. The career is over. You’re not going to un-tarnish your reputation making a comeback with the A’s. As a fantasy owner, I’d much rather see guys like Colin Cowgill, Chris Carter and Michael Taylor get a shot. You’re not on the juice anymore, you’re way past your prime and you’ll be playing all your games in a pitcher’s dream park. Step aside and let the kids play.

Oh, and let’s not forget about the ol’ Roger Clemens/Pedro Martinez half-season gimmick that Roy Oswalt will be playing this year. Who knows where he lands, but someone is getting bumped from a rotation and it’s not going to be from Houston, or Kansas City or some other bottom-feeder. He’s going to a contender and that team is going to have to kick someone back to the bullpen. Better hope it’s not one of your guys.

So hang it up guys. Admit you’re done and walk away with dignity, grace and a little bit of class. Haven’t we learned anything from the Brett Favre debacle in the NFL? Leave the game with your head held high, show some pride and stop messing with our fantasy season. You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here.