I wrote today’s Roto Riteup while on my knees, worshipping the idol known as Felix Hernandez.

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Did you see last night’s popular television program on the popular television network? Because the author of today’s Roto Riteup didn’t.

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Today’s Roto Riteup recognizes that the Sun is not our friend, but our greatest adversary.

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Today’s Roto Riteup is a classic Monday edition. I can’t tell you what that means, but I can tell you that it’s totally true.

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Today’s Roto Riteup is being written by an author who is watching his favorite team blow another leader against the White Sox.

• Well now, it appears as though John Jaso is enjoying a (very) small power surge. He now has hit a home run in back-to-back games and is getting more playing time as of late. At the time of writing he is 1-2 on the day. He is still buried on the team’s official depth chart, but keep an eye on his playing time. In only 320 (and counting the rest of this game) PA’s, Jaso has an excellent .381 wOBA. Much of that is tied to his outstanding 33:36 walk to strikeout ratio, but if you play in OBP leagues he is worth owning, sporadic playing time aside. His fantasy counting stats aren’t impressive but that is more due to a lack of playing time than a lack of talent. If you’re hurting at catcher (and who isn’t?) then you may find value in Jaso. He is available to be picked up in 97% of Yahoo! leagues and 99.8% of ESPN leagues. Those numbers are tough to read as a lot of leagues are just single catcher formats, but Jaso deserves better than this.
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It’s the weekend! Huzzah! Grab yourself some breakfast and relax. On the subject of breakfast, I can’t be the only one who’s breakfast habits are vastly different on the weekend than during the work week. For example, I usually eat a hot breakfast on days that I work, but my off days consist of sleeping in too late and not wearing pants all day.

• Prior to yesterday’s 2-5 performance, Alexi Amarista had a .286 average with a steal over the past seven days. He hit a bit of a road bump with a 1-20 slump last week, but he seems to have even things out. Amarista sports a seasonal .270 average and with his above average contact rate and solid minor league track record of speed, his .293 BABIP is something that I think will be on the rise. With a GB% of 50%, that just gives me even more reason to be optimistic on him. His ZiPS rest-of-season is pretty gruesome, but I’ll still take the over on that projection. He should be freely available in about 90% of both ESPN and Yahoo! leagues.
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Sticking with the food theme for now, today’s Roto Riteup is like a ham-and-cheese Lunchable. You’re giddy to have a Lunchable (the Riteup), but kind of let down that it isn’t the pepperoni pizza kind (Sanders). At least the ham-and-cheese kind (me) still comes with a fun sized candy bar!

• My old pitching frenemy Ubaldo Jimenez is back. He had an excellent outing yesterday and fanned 10 batters, but only lasted six innings and gave up three runs. His seasonal numbers are still brutal and his last five starts are a microcosm of his season: some awfulness, some excellence. At this point, it’s really anyone’s guess as to where the pinwheel of good Ubaldo/bad Ubaldo will land. If you’re a risk taker (i.e. chronic gambler) then go ahead and pick him up for the rest of the season. I for one will be leaving him alone. I’ve picked him up and dropped him more than my my old phone that broke because I dropped it too much. If you’re a risk taker, Ubaldo should be free to grab in 60% of ESPN formats and 50% of Yahoo! leagues.
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Today’s Roto Riteup is a lot like Mac N’ Cheese with hot dogs cut up into it; it’ll get you where you need to go, it’ll taste pretty good, and it’ll make you feel like trailer trash.

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Today’s Roto Riteup would like to be the next thing taken to Mars. You’ll have to print it out, first, but that’s not much of an obstacle.

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Breaking news: I turn half-way to 50 today. Go ahead, get your “old man” jokes in now. Now that the big news is out of the way, here is today’s Roto Riteup:

• There was a homer bonanza fueled by Justin Morneau in Minnesota yesterday. He crushed a pair of home runs and drove in four runs. That brings him to 23 hits in his past 15 games, including nine extra-base hits. Morneau is still available in over half of Yahoo! leagues and almost 40% of ESPN leagues. Act now before people fully realize what a tear he has been on.
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